But I watched a show on Obesity and our future generation the other day that had me in tears after about 10 minutes.
I was a big teenager, kid, and adult for sometime....I am getting to the Skinny Under My Fat. But she had a exercise where the kids stood before mom or dad and told them I hate...and they screamed off things they hated.
One beautiful girl who I wanted to just email Oprah and say give me her name number I want to call her and meet her and give her a huge hug and tell her it will be ok.
She screamed to her mom I hate that you are my best friend, my only friend. I hate that I don't have a father, I hate that you think you did this (as she waved her hands up and down her body) to me.
A boy screamed I hate that you and dad got a divorce, I hate that he remarried someone, I hate that I put a knife to my neck to kill myself.
It got me to thinking about my life until this point. It seemed theraputic so here goes my I hate...
I hate
- That I weighed 130 lbs in the 3rd grade
- That my thighs and ass are so big that my thighs rub together
- When looking in the mirror I can see the skinny person in me but no one else can
- my prom dress that was made because I couldn't find one in my size that was cute and not grandma looking
- Settling for boys that were no good
- Staying in volatile relationships because I thought I couldn't do better
- That I ever passed 300 lbs
- That I feel that my children have picked up my bad habits of eating the wrong foods
- When my little girl watches what I eat and refuses to eat something saying it will make her fat too so she doesn't want to eat it
- Not feeling comfortable in my own skin
- Not being able to run around the block with my kids
- Giving up on activities I used to love skiing, swimming and really enjoying it not worrying people were watching the beached whale get back in the water
- Not feeling sexy anymore no matter how much my husband tells me how much he loves me
- That my arms and thighs can literally clap as if they were my hands ughh
Tomorrow is my weigh in wish me luck!
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5 comments:
That is an interesting exercise.
Thank you for sharing so much of yourself.
Good luck on your weigh in.
It'll be that much more wonderful when you turn all these hates into loves then. You'll do it.
I watched that show - and that exact girl brought tears to my eyes. I thought about doing the exercise too.
I missed the show- but it seems that I almost always miss Oprah and talk shows. I am a homeschooler and there are days that TV just does not exist it seems. I have a seriously overweight teen, and he is the entire reason we are on this journey this time. It is funny , but I have a serious hormone condition that got me to extreme overweight, kept me infertile for 10 years and then I dropped 110 pounds and had my son. He is Autistic, had severe texture issues, and it got him to the nightmare weight of 425 pounds. One day a bench broke and I decided enough is enough, and our whole family jumped on the weight loss journey. I find myself in the very weird position of that little girl both yelling at her mom, yelling at herself, and heaping on the added guilt of being the mom o a seriously overweight child.I let her scream and rage for a minute, then I turn her fire around to positive moves. I make our life conducive to weight loss and health, I incorporate ways to turn struggles into support and keep cheering each other on. Boy I am rambling ! My point is that the best thing we can do for overweight teens is to become the best mentors that we can to lead them on the journey. It is one of those lessons that is more caught than taught.
I saw the show. I felt so sad and I could relate to all they were saying. It is hard to be a teenager in general, but even harder to be an obese teenager. I hope they can get to the point where they will concentrate on themselves, lose the weight and begin to enjoy their lives.
I can also relate to all your "hates". Unfortunately, we can't go backwards and undo everything that has gotten us to this point of "hate", we just have to move forward and gather up as many positives as possible. You are gonna do this! Good luck with WI =)
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