Thursday, March 22, 2012


I am trying to live by the lifestyle after RNY Weight Loss Surgery but little things keep creeping up and I am like HOLY CRAP I forgot about that.

I was very excited last night to tell my 2 x 1/2 marathon running friend Gina I will do the 1/2 at Virginia Beach it is the Rock and Roll Marathon Series. We so wanted to do one together but I posted on the WLS Support Board I am on and they were saying at 3 1/2 months out nutrition to live is key and that is going to be hard to get in enough at the beginning and train for a race. Plus the fluids as dehydration is common after surgery. So I am going to have to tell Gina I can't do this race with her but I can go and cheer her on and we can do the Princess Half in February at Disney together.

This support board has been critical in my decision to get the surgery. I have found out that I will wake up in all likelyhood and I shouldn't be so scared of dying. This surgery has no more risk vs. gall bladder removal and I lived to tell that tale.

The other change is Sugar/Carbs controlling those. Holy Cow to get those numbers right for the day is going to be a chore. The Nutritionist told me basically doing a modified Atkins diet that is what my life would be like after Gastric Bypass. I am excited to start that new life. I don't feel like a cheater or a quitter doing the surgery route. I know that I gave it my best in the exercise eating right area. I know that I could get the weight off too but I need that tool to curb my desires for the bad stuff. I am to scared to go against what my Dr tells me so this is what I needed.

So today I am going to start training for my half marathon which in all honesty I would love to by next February be able to say I am going to do the full Marathon (but the half gets a cuter medal LMAO and it is all about the medal ;-) I plan on doing a half, full, half iron man and doing a full ironman by the time I am 40. I have only 2 years and a few months left I gotta get moving. So today I am off to the gym when my daughter gets home. I am going to run a 5k and I am excited about that!

One day soon I will be peeling the fat and I will find the Skinny Under My Fat!
Dr. appt tomorrow to go over my Upper GI Test...who ever wants to have a scope down her throat ughhhh dreading it! But it is worth it for the end result!

Monday, March 19, 2012

A few things I am looking forward to...

It is funny I look at life in the future these days. My friend is getting a divorce and she said in January when it is final we are going to party!! I said oh good by January I will be skinny well not all the way skinny but small enough to wear a cute denim skirt high boots and a nice top LOL. She said you are crazy I said no that is what I do think of what phase I will hopefully be at when that time comes.

So a few of the things I can't wait to do or happen
-Dance Comps and Gymnastics Meets feel comfortable in my seat and not feel like I am taking up the person's next to me space
-Wearing a size Large and finally a Medium
-Being able to do a Zip Line
-Not having the seatbelt in our new car the base cuts into my thigh because my thigh goes over the small seat and rests on the seatbelt base it hurts like heck!
-Be able to see my toes just by looking down
-Able to sleep with my kids in the bunk beds we bought them and not fear they will come crashing down from my weight
-Sit with my legs crossed
-Sit at a table in a restaurant in a booth and not feel like I need to hold my breath to be able to fit
-Walking my girls into school the first day of school and see who notices how much weight I have lost
-Signing up for my first triathalon

I can't wait to start living my new life. I have started to follow my post bariatric surgery food guidelines like my Nutritionist said. I eat 1000 calories a day and have 100g of Protein and I have to say with all the water and protein I don't feel hungry. I have to keep my food planner near me at all times so I know what to eat and when. I am sure it will become a second habit soon enough. The only bad part is the constant having to pee from drinking so much. Ugh that is not fun but hey if I am peeing out fat that is great with me!

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Control and why do I have none?

I am not scared of the surgery (well yet once it is booked I am sure I will be) but I am scared of food in my house after surgery. Look my kids aren't on this diet, my husband should be on a diet but it is his choice and he chooses not to be. But how can I control myself from eating the bad things in the house before surgery? I know after surgery I have a fear of my pouch like I fear God. I know if I eat the wrong thing I will get very sick and I could need surgery to fix what I messed up or worse yet die. I don't think I will have issues after surgery. I would never want to test my pouch with say a carbonated drink. What if mine is the one that explodes? Nope not worth it. I wouldn't want to eat a solid to soon because what if I tear a suture line? So not worth with it and I wouldn't know for awhile right I believe I could bleed out at least that is my fear and it is enough to make me not try it.

So this is why I am so upset. On Sunday we went to BJ's and we love that store for all the wrong reasons. Big Blueberry Bakery muffins, best appetizers in the frozen section, and hello the packages are so much larger making me eat more and still have some left over for the family I don't really realize how much I consumed!

I got on yesterday and started logging away.
1 Blue Berry Muffin at 5am when I got home from work 540 calories
1 Blue Berry Muffin after the kids left for school 540 calories
1 Reese's Peanut Butter Cup ice cream treat to scared to look at the calories
1 cup of mini pretzels 180 calories

I entered this into my fitness pal tracker and I was already over by 19 points on the sugar. I hadn't even had lunch yet! My calories left me with 220 for the day. So I threw in the towel made the tortellini we bought at BJ's that night and said tomorrow is a new day. Only thing is I have had a muffin, I had some cashews, and I had the tortellini for lunch. I am sure I am not over today but I just worry about the food in the house.

My kids eat pretty healthy for the most part. Portion control, protein, veggie and a starch at dinner. We don't really do desserts if we do it is sugar free ice pops or jello. But yes we bought the Reese's Cup ice cream dessert because it had a coupon and who doesn't love a PB Cup?????

I am going to clean out the pantry and fridge today. My husband told me to put the bad stuff at the top of the pantry out of sight out of mind....ummm I put the stuff away I will know it is up on the top self. But I am going to do it.

I have my EAS Shakes, Greek Yogurt, Chicken Breast and fruit all ready to go but keep skipping over it for other bad food choices. Lord please help me to get on track. I don't want to go back to my Dr and have another visit where I don't lose some serious weight.

Control I need to find it!!! Just as badly as I need to find the skinny under my fat!