Sunday, March 7, 2010

I tried out for Biggest Loser!!!

I drove up to DC on Friday night with my friend Celia to try out for The Biggest Loser. It was a Open Casting Call. Well we arrived at 130am. Had to switch hotels cuz the one we booked wasn't the way it appeared online, room wasn't the one we requested, and the valet parking was full. So I called another Hotel they got us in and it was wonderful. DoubleTree on Rhode Island Ave it was the best I would highly recommend it to anyone looking to stay in DC. They had a cab ready for me at 6am, brought us towels at 2am, the beds were fabulous, and they let us keep the car in the valet parking area all day if we wanted to so we could sight see and not have to worry about parking even after check out!

Ok so I get up at 5am go down alone Celia and Candace are sleeping in a hour later and will join me. I get in the cab and go the line is already forming about 30 people in front of me. I go in and get a spot. They let us inside at 7am and the line is all out of sorts but I start to wonder do I want to be seen that early they might forget me after a day of interviews.

My friends arrive the staff look at Candace funny she lost 150 lbs last year and they almost don't let her in the room. I tell them give her a ticket (you got tickets to go into the room) I said she is trying out. They gave her a dirty look and gave her a ticket. So we are in and the room is filled with big people. I actually felt small. The seats were together and they were complaining that they had open seats to move next to each other. Well finally a guy yells I am big I take up 2 seats. The staff at the convention said finally get it the biggest loser has big people we need to take the seats apart. So they go row by row and tell us move the seats apart and we have room and are comfy. They turn up the a/c everyone is freezing it was awful. We get started at 10am I am done by 1130.

They call you back in groups of 10 to meet 1 of 2 casting directors. He asks for your photo your app and to tell him your name, age, how much you want to lose and what you do.
I said my name, 35, 140 lbs and I am a Domestic Goddess and raise my 4 amazing children.
He said we have 5 minutes for 10 people so I will ask 2 questions. You speak out and tell me your thoughts on the matter. Not to yell over people but get your points across if you can. If not send in a video if you felt your voice was not heard.

What type of discrimination have you felt from being overweight?
What is it like dealing with the public being fat?

I could barely get a word in edgewise! It was crazy but I did sit right next to the casting director and spoke directly to him. Our group at that point was the only one that they told had a call back in the group. He said I have one person from this group getting a call back and possibly a 2nd. Well they never look at your application or pic so how does he get to know what he wants in a 5 min interview with 10 people? He said I have been doing this a long time I know what we are looking for. So I haven't gotten a call yet but I am holding out hope. It was yesterday when I went so we shall see.

I was sitting by a guy who got a call back last year and wasn't picked. He said they get you to do a background investigation they interview you again and if you pass that you are flown to CA. They video you for the interviews too so they can see your tv presence.

If I don't get picked that is fine at least I went and experienced it.
If you have a casting call by you I suggest trying it out it was a lot of fun and the Casting Director was a cutie LOL.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

I have been defeated.....

I haven't really posted much because who wants to admit defeat? Who wants to say yep I am a big old failure? But I am going to say it. I failed at this dieting thing for the last 3 months. No need to make up excuses. Mornings when I should have had my butt out of bed I decided it was to cold sleep in or do a work out at home. No where near the intensity I would do in the gym! Or eating things and saying day after day ok I will start tomorrow. I don't have time to say TOMORROW. I need to get going again before all this weight I got off finds it way back to me. I am at 260 back in my 18's and they are tight as can be but I got rid of the 20's and I refuse to buy more. So mushroom top it will be until I get some weight off!

I think back on why I did this and I try to place blame. My husband brings crap into the house, my mom was here and I ate all her comfort foods, I get a snack and think it is only one snack it won't kill me....well sadly it won't kill me the second I eat it but it is slowly killing me. Slowly taking minutes off my life. My family doesn't force the food in my mouth they don't hold a gun to my head I control what goes in my mouth....MYSELF it is me. I need to love myself enough to know it is ok to say no and that FOOD IS FUEL. I need to find new ways to treat myself. I don't need to eat a Chocolate Reese's Peanut Butter Cup to feel better about something I did.

As I try to find the skinny under my fat I am going to admit this will be a longer road than I expected. But slowly and most definetly SURELY I WILL FIND THE SKINNY UNDER MY FAT!