Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Note to self....

As I watch the scale go back and forth back and forth it goes from 259.2 up to 267.4 yesterday I can't help but wonder. WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON inside of me! Ok maybe I was never meant to be skinny but I surely to God was not meant to be this big. I have been at this point for the last 6 months. I am trying and it seems nothing is working. The Wendie plan I am holding out hope on Thursday at WW I will see a loss.

But at the same time I can't beat myself up. My hubby just came home for lunch and I said look I am doing the working out part of it maybe I need to mix up my food part as well. I eat WW frozen meals for lunch and dinner most days and do cereal or yogurt for breakfast. Snacks normally are pretzels, ww bars, ww muffins, popcorn, and sometimes fruit.

My daughter told me today I am getting fat again. Again didn't know I ever was skinny....this from a 4 year old. I don't want her to remember me fat. I want her to remember the fun mom who could do anything with her and not get tired. Which by the way can I mention today I ran on the treadmill at 4.6 mph for 5 minutes Yes Ladies and Gents 5 whole minutes. I wanted to quit after 1 min 30 seconds but said this isn't hurting I should just keep going and I went on and on and on. I loved it and it made a mile go so much faster. I was doing walk run intervals while on the treadmill.

I am going to try not to beat myself up to much over all of this I know one way or another I am going to get this weight off and be healthy for me and my family.
M

2 comments:

Brooke said...

That's what it's all about - you and your family. I know exactly what you mean about wanting so badly to be healthy - especially for my kids. I never want my kids to remember me like I was - or still am now - I'm a little better, but not there yet. It's sometimes seems impossible. Way to go on the treadmill. Five minutes will turn into more soon. Keep pushing yourself! Good luck on your WI!!

hayngrl101 said...

I'm at a plateau also... I FEEL like I've worked out a lot and eaten well, but I can't help but second guess myself. Is it my perception of food? I know I've been keeping within my WW points, but I also know I've been loading on the carbs. I wonder if that is my problem? But then, on the treadmill, I've been doing better than I ever have... I noticed that my heart rate is not as high and I wonder if I need to be putting in more effort to keep the heart rate up in the fat burning zone. Choices, choices.

FWIW, my 6 yr old saw a slimquick commercial the other day and asked if we could buy it so I wouldn't be fat anymore... sometimes I am surprised that he notices my size.